The Red Bird Watches

Her dance 

in the backyard

stumbling like a drunk

past the lacquered posts 

her clumsy hands 

clutch a bottle of bubbles 

she chases the small dog pass

the painting on our gray wall

stenciled, faded blue and pink

a sun-drenched Our Lady of Guadalupe

which was done by the previous owner 

Lupita

below the painting’s feet, on the ground

is a large stone, flat

sometimes the small dog will scratch

at the stone or lay next to it and whine

but mostly he ignores it

the way I ignored the feeling

I should rush to see Betty

the morning before she died 

or the way I ignored my family 

when they were crying or the way

She ignores me when it’s time to put her shoes on

or the way the God of Painless Deaths 

ignored Betty’s requests or the way

the God of Four More Months

ignored her wish to meet our little girl

but this all happened of course 

before Betty turned into a red bird 

but after I learned that grandmas 

can have names like Betty

What did it feel like for Betty

to breathe YHWH out

for the last time and for her

to breathe YHWH in

for the first

although neither are Hebrew

The small dog ignores her dancing and bubbling

and scratches at the flat stone 

perhaps unable to ignore the feeling

that his friend the soft, black rabbit 

was buried there a year or more ago